The Relief Bottle

When my son was born, I was lucky that my husband was able to take a few weeks off to be with us. Because he is also a teacher, after his leave was up it was winter break, so he was home for an additional two weeks. In that time, my son and I were working out our breastfeeding difficulties and finally settling into some semblance of a routine. I was getting used to my new reality, which of course involved getting up several times a night to breastfeed. My son slept in his bassinet at first, so it was only a matter of reaching over and picking him up but he would scream bloody murder when I went to change his diaper and I'd have to nurse him back down to sleep again. Shortly after he made his way into our bed and at that point I barely had to do anything but unhook my bra. He seemed to seek out and find my nipple on his own and I eventually was able to sleep through most of his feedings.

But after the new year when my husband was back at work, I did start to feel resentful at times that as I sat up breastfeeding or carried the baby to his room for a diaper change, my husband was snoring away, totally oblivious. I just wanted a stretch of uninterrupted sleep and it seemed really unfair that I had to take 100% responsibility for all of the feedings. I had read about moms pumping a bottle so that their partners could share in the feeding duties and it seemed like a great idea. I had a pump, I'd just put a 4 oz bottle of breastmilk on ice in our bedroom and when the baby woke up, I'd happily hand him off to Daddy and roll over and go back to sleep for another three hours. Score!

Except....not so much. I had to practically kick my husband awake and I couldn't fall back to sleep so I was up for the entire feeding anyway. Then it took quite a bit of jiggling/walking to get Miles back to sleep after, and I was awake through all of that too. In the morning I was engorged. After a couple more nights of this, I had a plugged milk duct and I was through. The relief bottle was more of a hindrance than a help.

I'm always surprised when moms say this arrangement worked for them. Obviously if it works for you, then yay and keep at it. But this idea that pumping a bottle so dad can take over a nightfeed never seems to come with the caveat that it can lead to other problems. And the advice to pump a bottle so dad can share in the feedings never seems to come with any advice on how to do this while still managing your milk supply.

So what say you? Yay or nay on the relief bottle?
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Help! My baby won't take a bottle

One of the problems breastfeeding moms seem to have most often is how to get a breastfed baby to take a bottle. If you're lucky enough to be a stay-at-home mom, your baby may never need to take a bottle. However, if you're a working mom, once your maternity leave is up you'll need to figure out a way to get the baby to drink milk from another source. So what is a mom to do if your baby won't take a bottle? Here are some ways to troubleshoot the problem and some solutions that have worked for many moms.

First things first, what's in the bottle? Many breasted babies will balk at the taste of formula. And can you blame them? Have you tasted it? I have and it's pretty vile. If you need to supplement your baby because of low milk supply and have no choice but to use formula, do an experiment and taste them. I found one brand's ready-to-serve to be the most palatable.

If you're offering your baby expressed breast milk in a bottle and she is refusing, it might be that the taste of your milk is off. Are you properly handling and storing your milk? Breast milk will keep for about a week in the refrigerator and about 3 months in a regular freezer, 6 months in a deep freezer.

Smell your milk. Does it smell soapy? Does it taste sour? If so, you may have a problem with excess lipase. Lipase is an enzyme normally found in breast milk, but if you have too much it will break your milk down quicker, resulting in the off taste. What you can do is scald your expressed milk to 180 degrees, then chill and freeze. This can be done in a pan on the stove. Be careful not to overheat the milk, which can kill off the nutrients.

If your baby is old enough, you may want to skip bottles all together and move straight to the cup. Many breastfed babies like sippy cups with straw tops, but experiment to find the one your baby likes. If your baby is very young, you can try finger feeding, feeding with a syringe or a dropper. These methods may take longer, but will be worth it if baby is eating happily.

You can also try some of the newer bottles and nipples made especially for babies who will be going back and forth between the bottle and the breast. I have heard good things about the Adiri breast-shaped bottles and the Playtex Naturalatch nipples. Nipples for breastfed babies should have a wide base that requires the baby to open wide. Nipples should be slow-flow.

Here are some other techniques for getting a breastfed baby to take a bottle:

• Have dad or another caregiver offer the bottle, not mom. Breastfed babies know that mom has the good stuff and will be wondering why she won't give it up!
• Warm up the breast milk or formula. Breast milk is served up at body temperature and your baby may be used to having warm milk and refuse anything cold.
• Some breastfed babies like to be held in a nursing position when given a bottle. Others need to be looking away from the caregiver and offered the bottle from behind.
• Don't wait until the baby is really hungry to offer the bottle. A hungry, frustrated baby probably won't take well to something new.

If your baby is refusing all methods of bottle feeding and is over the age of 6 months, you can offer solids and juice during the day at daycare. Younger babies may completely reverse cycle. Reverse cycling is when your baby switches days and nights and nurses frequently at night and sleeps longer stretches during the day. Reverse cycling is much easier to handle if you co-sleep. Eventually you will not wake up for feedings or will learn to quickly fall back to sleep afterwards. Some women actually don't mind it at all when their baby reverse cycles because there is less pressure to pump a certain number of ounces during the day because you know baby will get what he needs at night.

Do you have any other suggestions for moms whose breastfed babies won't take a bottle? Have you worked through this issue? How did you get your baby to take a bottle?

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