tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3536683374417960813.post6475605945344744255..comments2023-09-09T11:07:31.879-04:00Comments on Blacktating: A Parent Is Born: Online Reality Show SeriesElitahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01294923997458681675noreply@blogger.comBlogger31125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3536683374417960813.post-20302998659444241792010-08-17T07:46:06.402-04:002010-08-17T07:46:06.402-04:00There has been and always will be a small percenta...There has been and always will be a small percentage of the population who cannot breastfeed. But most people who used alternatives to breast milk like animal milk in bottles and wet nurses didn't do that because they couldn't breastfeed, they did it because they didn't want to breastfeed. Two completely different things. And I'm not sure if I understand your second comment. Do you mean formula seems safer than unpasteurized milk from a cow? Well, yeah, of course it does. But does it seem safer than another woman's breast milk? Hell no.Elita @ Blacktatinghttp://www.blacktating.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3536683374417960813.post-27485085760232115092010-08-17T01:30:55.785-04:002010-08-17T01:30:55.785-04:00Honestly, through the ages people have had a hard ...Honestly, through the ages people have had a hard time with breastfeeding. Otherwise, we wouldn't have stories in our history of people feeding their babies animals' milk from a bottle, or wet nurses. Alternatives to mama's milk have been around long before formula companies. Formula just seems safer than unpasteurized milk from Bessy, personally.Laynajeannoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3536683374417960813.post-62771267202571752172010-08-16T16:05:43.768-04:002010-08-16T16:05:43.768-04:00Me, too! I cut the milk protein out of my diet (w...Me, too! I cut the milk protein out of my diet (which wasn't easy) but it allowed us to continue the breastfeeding relationship. If I hadn't, it would have been switching from one formula to another trying to find the "right" one. I did give him a sample of one of those expensive formulas when he was diagnosed with the milk protein allergy. As soon as it hit his stomach, he threw it up! So that was it! Wasn't trying that stuff again!DoulaCindynoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3536683374417960813.post-23993785576809159242010-08-08T00:46:28.556-04:002010-08-08T00:46:28.556-04:00Dang, you're right. A quick Google search show...Dang, you're right. A quick Google search shows she's an aspiring actress who's been in a ton of commercials.Elita @ Blacktatinghttp://www.blacktating.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3536683374417960813.post-9971775380337049492010-08-08T00:34:51.453-04:002010-08-08T00:34:51.453-04:00I found this even more interesting a few days afte...I found this even more interesting a few days after I watched the video. I was at the mall and passed by a face cleansing kiosk. They had a tv on showing a commercial and I saw, what looked like, Mrs. Favela in pigtails and braces explaining how that product helped her skin. Didn't really surprise me that this "reality" tv show is as much as a reality as Rock of Love season 4 is.Jennifer Leenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3536683374417960813.post-35595006344922769962010-08-05T19:20:18.202-04:002010-08-05T19:20:18.202-04:00It is always extremely hard when you have a friend...It is always extremely hard when you have a friend who is unable to meet the goals she set for herself. And yes, somehow extra super frustrating when it's someone who suffered through infertility. You'd think they'd never use CIO or would do anything to overcome any breastfeeding difficulties. I have another friend who recently fell out with friends over these same issues, but the other way around: they felt she was a bad mom because she was "too attached"!<br /><br />And yes, I do have a Facebook page. You can add me as a friend www.facebook.com/blacktating and "like" the fan page http://www.facebook.com/#!/pages/Blacktating-Blog/53503707815?ref=tsElita @ Blacktatinghttp://www.blacktating.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3536683374417960813.post-23159682771553931212010-08-05T17:35:54.194-04:002010-08-05T17:35:54.194-04:00wow. you're right, not surprising. but sad jus...wow. you're right, not surprising. but sad just the same. i hate that this is the message new moms see. it kills me all the misinformation out there. :( I have a good friend who tried for over 6 years to get pregnant. She finally had their son a few months ago, and I was beyond thrilled for her. She had talked to me during her pregnancy about wanting to breastfeed after seeing the great example of my children breastfeeding and I was so happy and couldn't wait to be there for her and be support and share that experience. So many things went differently from what I had hoped for her, but things that are considered normal these days. Talked into a csection, told it was necessary.. for reasons I know probably weren't. sigh. Then badgered into supplementing and giving a pacifier in the hospital. Circumcising. One of the biggest disappointments for me find out. And I tried not to be judgemental at all, as I sat on the phone with her in the middle of the night as she cried not knowing why her screaming-his-lungs-out traumatized baby would no longer latch. Anyway, long story short. She has gone the way of the women in this video, the "whatever works best for my family" route, a nice way to justify making choices she knows aren't the best for her baby. Started supplementing with formula by 2 months. Started giving him rice cereal by 3 months. Honestly I just couldn't sit by and bite my tongue anymore, so I feel awful, but we haven't talked in a few weeks. I still care a lot for this friend, but seeing her fall victim to all of the mainstream traps and be happy about it and talking about how its best for her family.. it made me want to scream. So.. maybe I'm not a great friend after all. :/ I just can't see this happen to one more person. And this friend trying for sooo long and then ending up sacrificing everything she had planned on.. it just killed me to sit there and have to act supportive when I wanted to help her succeed so badly. I've been nursing for almost 6.5 years straight, have so much information and experience to share.. and I feel like she just went with the mainstream instead of listening to info that might have been helpful. :/ Anyway, thank you for posting this. Just another commentary on this society and its negative message about breastfeeding and natural parenting. <br /><br />New to your blog, and enjoying it by the way!! Do you have a facebook page for the blog?? You totally should!! :)mommytomyjbabiesnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3536683374417960813.post-53410344730500920082010-08-05T10:01:21.041-04:002010-08-05T10:01:21.041-04:00Yes, everything is very deliberate. Notice that th...Yes, everything is very deliberate. Notice that the breastfeeding mother is also much prettier than the other two. She's very glamorous, long, thick beautiful hair, dressed nicely, etc. I'm not trying to body snark, but the other two are plain Janes who look downright frumpy next to her. I think all of this is on purpose. We're supposed to relate to those two, the "regular" moms. The breastfeeding mom is super put together, of course she'd be able to breastfeed, us regular women are going to have a much harder time. Again, these messages are subtle, but I do think they penetrate.Elita @ Blacktatinghttp://www.blacktating.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3536683374417960813.post-54790039606498561022010-08-05T05:27:45.189-04:002010-08-05T05:27:45.189-04:00I also think that these moms were carefully chosen...I also think that these moms were carefully chosen by the sponsors of the program. I would NOT be surprised in the least if part of the application process asked about feeding experiences.<br /><br />I think that the two ladies were chosen because they are misinformed about feeding AND because of their feeding experiences. It's very clever marketing on Similac's part. And really, it just breaks my heart that they the misinformation that they believe will be spread to so many others.Curry_cynthianoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3536683374417960813.post-29448068217735911022010-08-04T20:06:53.654-04:002010-08-04T20:06:53.654-04:00Heh. Allergic to human milk? Seems pretty doubtful...Heh. Allergic to human milk? Seems pretty doubtful. They told my mother that when I was born, because I screamed a lot. Scream for you to pick me up, scream for you to put me down. She breastfed anyway and I thrived anyway, and continued to be a demanding I-want-it-and-I-want-it-now-you're-doing-it-wrong high maintenance baby. The only thing the 'diagnosis' of allergies and the formula-pushing did was make my mom feel bad about herself when she was already having trouble with the shocking difference between me and my easy-going older brother.Grafnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3536683374417960813.post-91708740460062996272010-08-03T22:05:23.437-04:002010-08-03T22:05:23.437-04:00This just makes me sad... I hate how "reality...This just makes me sad... I hate how "reality shows" portray people anyway, as being totally UNrealistic, and now they are infiltrating into breastfeeding as well...Erinnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3536683374417960813.post-84108600522105527842010-08-03T21:33:28.880-04:002010-08-03T21:33:28.880-04:00yes no one ever talks about the horrible things fo...yes no one ever talks about the horrible things formula feeding mothers say about breastfeeding mothers. I am so sick of this formula feeding mother as a victim thing. Pardon my blutness but these women need to grow a sack.<br /><br />And I had to formula feed. Im sick of the incessantly perpetuated myth of the harassed formula feeding mother. When I see a formula feeding mother kicked out of a public establishment for simply feeding her child then maybe I will take on that cause - for now: give me a break.Veronicahttp://twitter.com/CrunchyVTMommynoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3536683374417960813.post-12084283758323384162010-08-03T21:22:48.430-04:002010-08-03T21:22:48.430-04:00haha so true. i always respond with something like...haha so true. i always respond with something like: well Ive done an assload of blow and turned out fine. wonder if the baby wants some.<br /><br />some people are such tools. <br />this "series" is so sneaky and is exactly why people dont believe how sneaky formula companies are. most people are stupid and really truly believe that a money grubbing corporation cares about babies.Veronicahttp://twitter.com/CrunchyVTMommynoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3536683374417960813.post-53875595656114409602010-08-03T20:31:32.538-04:002010-08-03T20:31:32.538-04:00I hope they will delete some, I would have been ex...I hope they will delete some, I would have been extremely hurt if I had been a mother on this webisode reading these things. What does it solve to hurt each other?<br />We should just take care that blogs, websites, whatever the media source may be concentrate not on shaming good mothers for their mislead choices, but banding together toward a common goal: demanding better education and better support.Guestnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3536683374417960813.post-5730267106329770422010-08-03T17:44:48.970-04:002010-08-03T17:44:48.970-04:00I can't control the comments on the KellyMom p...I can't control the comments on the KellyMom page, but from what I've seen in the past, Kelly is very good about deleting comments that are out of control. While I do thing Similac/Pampers/Beechnut chose these women very carefully, I don't think any of this was scripted at all.Elita @ Blacktatinghttp://www.blacktating.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3536683374417960813.post-67103648566702622162010-08-03T16:54:50.250-04:002010-08-03T16:54:50.250-04:00Wow, a breastfeeding segment sponsored by a formul...Wow, a breastfeeding segment sponsored by a formula maker...if that doesn't seem a bit messed up I don't know what is...Stephaniehttp://www.spiritandseed.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3536683374417960813.post-83644213206614552532010-08-03T16:25:46.266-04:002010-08-03T16:25:46.266-04:00Wow. That is so blatant.
But it actually does ...Wow. That is so blatant. <br /><br />But it actually does happen all the time. We recently had a friend told by her doctor that her milk was too much like "skim milk" and that she needed formula for her baby to get "good nutrition."<br /><br />That...from a doctor...<br /><br />So it happens.<br /><br />Thanks for sharing this in your post!BreastfeedingMhttp://www.breastfeeding-magazine.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3536683374417960813.post-25554639950115780052010-08-03T16:16:58.583-04:002010-08-03T16:16:58.583-04:00Calling these mothers' comments damaging is pr...Calling these mothers' comments damaging is pretty judgmental, we have no way of knowing what was scripted by Similac and what was really them sharing hardships. It wasn't so much you bashing, but the way this was portrayed so negatively that opened it up to comments such as diegosmama who equates formula feeding with spanking, quote "And it makes me sick how people use this line to justify things like spanking, formula feeding, etc. " (I'd say that's bashing). Also, Kellymom.com posted this blog entry on facebook and opened it for comments. That's where I saw most of the really horrifying things people had to say to these mothers.<br />Again, I beg people, be critical of the doctors but not of these poor mothers (which I agree you tried to do). We need each other as mothers, we have to stick together, be honest with each other, and respect everyone's experience. This includes both sides! Super natural birth mothers who breast feed and those who use drugs and formula feed. I would criticize the mothers who have made you feel bad for sharing your natural birth story just as heavily, and I have had the exact same experience.Guestnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3536683374417960813.post-4218698933771222162010-08-03T16:09:16.549-04:002010-08-03T16:09:16.549-04:00The fact that even medical "professionals&quo...The fact that even medical "professionals" aren't helping women is pathetic! Unfortunately, I've heard many of the same stories from personal friends. And I just bite my lip!doniellehttp://twitter.com/doniellenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3536683374417960813.post-58432555406525296502010-08-03T14:41:11.829-04:002010-08-03T14:41:11.829-04:00I have no words. This is shameful.I have no words. This is shameful.Jessiehttp://samann1121.blogspot.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3536683374417960813.post-79201925303162405922010-08-03T13:55:38.865-04:002010-08-03T13:55:38.865-04:00Who is judging these mothers for their choices? Wh...Who is judging these mothers for their choices? Who is bashing formula feeders? I specifically said that I feel they were sabotaged by their health care providers. If a mom is having trouble with breastfeeding and calls her pediatrician, the answer she gets shouldn't be, "Switch to formula." I do feel awful for the first mom who says she saw 7 different lactation consultants, but I'm having a hard time believing that not one recommended an elimination diet and none were able to get the baby back to the breast. If that part is true, then again, this woman was "booby trapped" by the very people who were supposed to support her and help her to meet her breastfeeding goals. It could be that by the time she did find a good lactation consultant, the nipple confusion or preference was too great to overcome. But did the mom explain that, or did she basically say, "Thank God for formula for turning my baby into a wonderful child!" This whole thing is marketing and some of it is subtle and some of it is a sledgehammer. If I saw this as a mom-to-be, I'd be thinking, "Wow, who knew so much would go wrong with breastfeeding?" I bet a lot of women would, too. And they'd also be thinking, "I better have some Similac on hand...just in case." And so it goes....<br /><br />Of course mothers should be able to share their experiences without being judged, but it just feels like only those with negative feelings towards breastfeeding and birth are allowed to speak up. Women who have amazing, empowering natural births don't feel comfortable sharing that with other women. Women who find breastfeeding a breeze or who absolutely love nursing are told to kick rocks when they express their feelings. Why are we so quick to protect the feelings of formula-feeding moms but feel free to dump on women who've enjoyed breastfeeding?Elita @ Blacktatinghttp://www.blacktating.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3536683374417960813.post-41235941777417099892010-08-03T13:49:20.883-04:002010-08-03T13:49:20.883-04:00She also said that she was allergic to "even ...She also said that she was allergic to "even her own" milk protein....which is highly unlikely.Esthernoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3536683374417960813.post-4849033417461834182010-08-03T13:05:11.313-04:002010-08-03T13:05:11.313-04:00Some of it was clearly marketing, but I also think...Some of it was clearly marketing, but I also think it is unfair to judge these mothers for their choices. I also think it is important to be able to share issues with feeding our children with other women without feeling like we will be bashed by sites like this. We have no idea how hard that must have been for those families. Yes, I do think that some of the advice they were given was wrong. I have a dairy-sensitive infant, and rather than switch to formula, I cut out dairy from my own diet. I wish those doctors had told them they could do that. <br />What nobody is talking about here is how this was a painful thing for these mothers. They did see lactation consultants and spent a lot of time trying to figure out what was best for their families. To me, that makes them just as good at being mothers as those who stick to breastfeeding. <br />Let's all please remember that mothers need to share without feeling judged. We also need to be treated like we can make educated decisions about feeding our children. You all are acting like one webisode will put mothers off of breastfeeding forever. It IS hard for many mothers, and we shouldn't have to feel like we need to lie about our experiences just so others will feel better. Blogs like these, who bash formula feeders, are just as bad as those who bash breastfeeding, because both are equally wrong in criticizing people who are trying to be good parents.<br />This is all coming from a mother who has done everything possible to continue to nurse a 9 month old dairy-sensitive baby with very bad acid reflux, and I am now in my first trimester with baby no. 2. I laughed this webisode off. Maybe you all should too.Guestnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3536683374417960813.post-14323837006738018812010-08-03T12:40:16.686-04:002010-08-03T12:40:16.686-04:00Yeah, this is definitely not a video for new moms,...Yeah, this is definitely not a video for new moms, as you said, basically saying that there is a huge possibility your baby won't be able to breastfeed. Aren't babies born knowing how to nurse? Anything that a formula company produces has a goal of selling their products and they know they can't sell to breastfeeding moms. I definitely wouldn't recommend new moms to watch this.Allisonnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3536683374417960813.post-11859491477547022812010-08-03T12:40:14.434-04:002010-08-03T12:40:14.434-04:00I think it is absolutely ridiculous that doctors w...I think it is absolutely ridiculous that doctors would recommended formula as opposed to helping the moms to successfully breastfeed. I'm so glad that my ob/gyn & pediatrician are both BF moms and understand enough to help me out when I have questions. Also glad that they referred me to the breastfeeding center that helped my breastfeeding relationship grow strong. That fee I paid for the LC was far less than formula and really surprised that "Suzie" would mention the expensive LCs but not the expensive formula...Mrs. Darria Thttp://twitter.com/DivaGlam23noreply@blogger.com